More Notes from a Crystal Therapy Session 120318

It brings me so much joy and pleasure to witness someone experience a healing of some sort, even more so when I don’t have any expectations of the outcome. Energy work is real and I am so thankful to have the perfect clients, I look forward to having more of these experiences in 2019. I am memorizing this blissful feeling and encoding it into my DNA. Or perhaps I have always known how to do this in a past life perhaps (a client mentioned this to me before), I had just forgotten and am barely remembering it now in this life.

Of course it hurts me to see people in pain; a part of me wants to cry along with them but at the same time I get to learn how to help them transmute this pain, which simply is energy.

This time around, the person receiving the healing and myself saw colors. We literally saw the same colors – pinks & reds – when I was chelating around her heart chakra.

On Saturday, I also activated my Light Language codes. Oddly enough I had been drawing these symbols repetitively for the last few months long before I even knew what LL was, not realizing that these would be MY codes. How wonderful and so very synchronistic.

I was also able to activate verbal, written & movement LL codes, which surprised me even more because I was not expecting it, especially the verbal part.

Anyways, I am pretty excited about where my life is headed right now. I still don’t know what direction I’m going in anymore, but as long as I follow my true interests, my intuition will guide me.

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
For crystal healing/therapy sessions, visit me at Crystal Healer LA.
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

The Out There is Right Here❤️👽❤️

I drew this today (Monday, November 5 2018).

I’m here, trying to just be and go with the flow. I once saw someone on Twitter tweet this out: “only dead fish go with the flow”.

So as usual, I’m conflicted.

Like, how do we just go with the flow if we are conscious beings, when we’re wired a certain way. It really takes effort to reprogram our minds and to find balance between wanting stuff to happen already versus allowing it to come to you.

I want so many things, but mostly I want to learn everything that fascinates me.

Right now I have a list of things I want to learn or make my way towards:

Light Language
Medical Intuitive
Holistic Life Coach
Quantum Healing Hypnosis
Transpersonal Psychology

I’ve also been considering going into Massage Therapy but then again I’m not sure whether I’m ready to touch people…I’m still thinking about it though.

I don’t know. I want to focus on one thing and get really good at it. But it also feels like I need to do other things too. Why? Selling minerals is cool but tbh, I’m already losing interest in it. Perhaps I was a bit naive in thinking that I was always going to make consistent sales, but not only that – selling gets boring after a while. I feel that I also made some poor decisions and spent more than I made. Lesson learned, I guess.

My intuition is leading me to a consciousness upgrade, it seems. It wants me to learn all this stuff that I’ve never even considered wanting to get into.

So here I am again, wondering where my life is going next. I honestly don’t know anymore. This is what wanted to come out today while drawing.

My Faith in Reiki Has Been Restored⚡️

I’m typing this before I forget. I woke up with a bad headache on the right side of my head. It was probably because I ate too much salty chips with hummus…then an hour later I had cheezy poofs the night before and didn’t actually eat dinner. I probably didn’t drink a whole lot of water either. It happens.

So I put Selenite on the the side of my head where the pain was and that sort of helped. Blue Calcite worked even better but the headache came back again in waves. I should also mention that my husband told me to drink Gatorade because I needed electrolytes so I did that. And some water of course.

While all of the above helped, my headache was still there, lingering.

So I called upon my true Reiki masters & guides to assist me with removing this headache, got into a quiet, expansive, meditative state and put my hands on the sides of my head for a few minutes.

Needless to say, it worked; my headache subsided and my faith in Reiki has been restored, the Usui method. Also, my husband got us breakfast. I’m thankful.

For the past week I was having serious doubts about my Reiki practice after having learned that a false light agenda existed and has been infiltrating through the various Reiki symbols. So I had to search out some answers to my own questions. If you are open minded and want to get weird, please read my previous blog post: Reiki and Reptilians

Reiki and Reptilians

I must warn you now: this shit’s going to be weird and might freak you out but yes I’m going there because A) this is my blog and B) it’s all I’ve been thinking about these last few days and I needed an answer to my question:

Is Reiki another form of manipulation, is it part of the false light agenda?

These questions came up for me recently as I browsed on Instagram and saw that some healers have had their Reiki symbols removed; claiming that Reiki is another part of the Reptilian agenda to manipulate people who are spiritual.

What the fucking fuck.

I’ve been attuned to Reiki levels I and II in Usui method so of course this freaked me the fuck out and needed to know right away if I had just taken on some form of reptilian mind control.

The short answer is: no. But still, it took almost 5 days to find an answer that I’m partially satisfied with and on the first day of discovering this – my anxiety levels were rising and it felt real. I couldn’t get it out of my mind. I guess it didn’t help that I started reading one of David Icke’s books to try to know more about reptilians, then I started YouTubing shit and learned all about the false light propaganda that is happening amongst us. It was definitely an eye-opener that was part fascination, part anxiety, part everything really.

So anyways, this video sort of gave me some relief but at the same time not really: Reptilian Carrier Wave in Reiki and Possible MK Ultra Connection

The lesson here? Question everything, including your own motives and listen/trust your own intuition. It’s tempting to not question it especially when everyone is doing it. Like right now, there’s so many people getting Reiki attunements, myself included.

Although I haven’t had a negative experience with Reiki, I’m on the fence right now. There were a couple of instances where people compared Reiki systems and a lot of them claimed that the ones they’re getting attuned to are more ‘powerful’.

Something about that puts me off, because the word ‘power’ can be so easily abused. You must ask yourself, why are you getting attuned or why do you want to be a Reiki master? Do you think you will gain more power? What kind of power are we talking about exactly and power over who or what? I thought the whole point of spirituality was to realize/actualize our own power, not look to an outside source.

For example – during attunement we work with an ascended master from an oracle deck. I honestly am not familiar with a lot of these so called ascended masters. Like really though, who are they?

I don’t know. Reptilians seek power and control so is there some subliminal connection there?

As they say around October/November that the veil is thin and entities from other dimensions can enter this one.

So basically this whole thing opened up Pandora’s box and I might have to step away from it all to get clear again. It’s no wonder I kept my Black Tourmaline close to me this whole time.

I Like Creating Cute Things

In trying to figure out what brings me joy and pleasure in my work life and how to attract more of it, I’ve come to these conclusions:

+ I like creating cute shit.
+ I like creating cute, bright, colorful shit.
+ I like creating animated GIFs

That’s all I’ve got. I feel like I could work at a place that’s cute, fun and matches my graphic style, but for adults (and I don’t mean porn). I think there should be more places that cater to the kid inside of us. BOOM, I just gave you an idea.

Complaining about what I don’t enjoy doing doesn’t get me anywhere – I know because I just went there AGAIN recently😫. It just brings me down and puts me in a stupid mood. So I need to get clear on what it is I really enjoy doing and not focus so much on the things I don’t enjoy.

Web design I don’t mind so much, just not into the heavy programming. I’ve tried for the life of me to learn Javascript and PHP, I did not go very far.

I enjoy writing if it’s something interesting & relevant to me.

I feel like motion graphics would be the next thing to learn, as I do enjoy animating and making things move.

I enjoy some aspects of marketing, a lot of it I don’t really care for.

I know I sound like a broken record, but I want to leave my comfortable job. At the same time it feels like I shouldn’t because I have a partner and a cat that depend on me.

I’m very much aware that I just put some limitations on my desires. It’s dumb, I know. I’m working on it but at the same time I’m not working on it…

I’m definitely on some kind of journey at the moment, one where I keep seeking to learn more about healing and becoming proficient at being a healer. There is no unhealthy ego attached here, this is where my intuition has been taking over and leading me to as of late. Reiki and Trans Crystal Therapy were the catalyst, now I’m being led to keep on learning more. How do I know this? It’s all I seem to want to think and read about but not in an obsessive way, just going with it and expanding my knowledge and awareness of this magnificent universe we live in and how its energy flows and manifests through us.

It’s a little bit of everything that I like – esoteric, psychology, science, energy work and metaphysical all rolled into one. There’s also a lot of art and imagination involved, as we are working as well as creating and visualizing things that can’t be seen but actually do exist.

So what about the crystal shop?

It’s there, quietly continuing to build itself. My ego helped me create that, but it’s taken a back seat. Too much ego creates competition, separation and stress so I had to take myself out of it because it simply didn’t make me feel good. And yeah, I also had to cut back on spending money since there is only 1 person in my little family that’s working: me.

So I watermarked this gif because it’s the damn internet and people like to steal.

If you’re reading this, I hope you are having a fun and relaxing summer doing what you want to do rather than doing things you have to do. Remember, you are important.✨🖤✨

A Wannabe Bodhisattva

Never have I minded my business so hard than after Reiki II attunement. Other than learning to use two more symbols for channeling life force energy and healing, I didn’t think anything would really happen afterwards…

Let’s just say anything tied to my emotional attachments have completely dropped off. I haven’t had any desire to post on Twitter or lurk on anyone’s Instagram, I feel as if I have nothing to say. I am in my own world right now.

I literally feel like a bodhisattva, surrounded by lotus flowers and floating on a cloud. Seeing everything from a higher perspective, wanting to help people end their suffering. I’m physically here and simultaneously on another plane of existence…

except I’m not a bodhisattva. I still have to go to work and look at nudes. 8 years of working in the adult entertainment industry, let’s just say I’m ready for something else…but what that something else is, I don’t even know.

I was going to post a pic of a Green Tara but chose to do this rough sketch instead and started playing with it more. Her skin is green so I made this girl green.

Everything’s the same and yet everything’s different.

My TCT final is this weekend, June 9th. I’ve been practicing doing crystal therapy on people at least once a week. So thankful that my friends & co-workers are open minded enough to try it. During my final, I’ll be doing a crystal therapy on someone I don’t know…

wish me luck.

On Some Life Purpose Shit

I think I’m S L O W L Y starting to see my life purpose…and (I think) it sort of involves the fact that I’m weird with an open mind & open heart and the fact that I also work behind the scenes in the adult entertainment industry.

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you’ll probably notice that I rarely discuss my job. It’s a marketing and graphic design job so it’s nothing too exciting (unless you love sex & nudes, HA). I create lots of visual content sure, but I also look at a lot of data and some of it involves being technical.

But because of it, I’m attracting those who are weird like me that seek healing (they seek the crystals, not me btw) but can’t seem to be accepted by certain spiritual folk because it’s beyond their level of ‘weird’…

Spiritual folk who have issues with sex, sex workers and people who are on the fringe. And maybe even those who are all those things and are also POC. Those are the people who find me. People whom I accept because even though I don’t fully know what it’s like to be a sex worker, marketing for this industry allows me to understand a whole lot more than the average person.

And I have learned a lot from working here. I’m not even all that weird, really…as far as I know I’m straight and I don’t have a kinky lifestyle. I go to bed at 10pm and I get up to go to work just like everyone else, it’s just the content that’s different.

The secret’s out folks: I’m actually really boring as fuck.😉

But like I said, I try to always have an open mind and an open heart. I’m learning to recognize Spirit in all things.

I mean, didn’t Jesus spend time with the lepers and the freaks?

And while I’ve worked here, I’ve delved into spirituality more and more – tarot, crystals, reiki, etc.

They’re all sort of merging into one…becoming something new.

I had a tarot reading with a good friend recently and she pulled the II of Wands from the Deviant Moon Tarot Deck and said something profound.

It went something like this:

Your two creative jobs are crossing over each other; they are becoming more fluid. There is no separation, just a flow of energy flowing in and out of one another.

I had to write this down before it slipped away.

Here are some other possible meanings for the Two of Wands.

I Am an Avatar

I’ve been on a solo introspection kind of trip. Loner but not lonely. I’m an only child so I have never minded being alone. But I did come to earth to learn how to relate to others via Life Path Number 6 and The Lovers card in Tarot.

I haven’t been sales or business motivated either and I haven’t really been posting consistently on Instagram at all. I’m beginning to doubt whether I am good with this whole business/social media thing, as I don’t like to be pushy/force people to buy and post on social media a lot.

I feel like maybe I am just a perpetrator, pretending to be in these roles to see which one fits. I also feel like a perpetrator in marketing because I don’t do everything that marketers are supposed to do. I can go on and on really.

Perhaps January is just a dreary month and my energy will ramp back up.

I got sick around my birthday in December AND I got sick with the flu mid January 2018 so yeah – it took me out of the loop and it’s taking a while for me to get fully back in my body. I still feel like I’m not fully “here”.

And now that I’m finally getting better, I’m just thankful to not be sick. I appreciate my body a whole lot more, I was able to recovery quickly and still go to work and do shit.

I’ve been traversing space and time, seeing myself beyond my own human consciousness – watching my own avatar do stuff in this 3d world. It gives me trippy feelings, like when I used to play a game on my phone like The Simpsons Tapped Out.

It makes me feel like YES – there’s an invisible, non-human force beyond me that is also ME, guiding me. Not like a puppet on a string, but more like a bigger, cosmic, infinite version of myself, watching me inside a sphere, the Earth…like a snowglobe.

The ALL is mind.

And though my mind can’t fully comprehend it, my intuition can. This is how we break through the feelings of being stuck, limited, trapped in a box; feeling like we’re not enough.

This is how one can be fearless, and to not worry that you didn’t save up your money in a 401k or didn’t follow your parents’ idea of what you’re supposed to be in this world.

Anyway, this is how I’ve been feeling lately. I had to draw this a few times before I was satisfied with showing it. Maybe I will draw it again, I need a bigger piece of paper though.

We are all avatars.