I’ve been working on developing my psychic ability lately. Why? I don’t really know. Ok well I do actually (I kinda want to eventually give psychic readings under Crystal Healer LA) but…it might be a while before I actually get to that point. Also, I believe developing my psychic ability makes me more creative? Anyways, in order to become psychic, you must learn to meditate. I’ve been meditating consistently for over a year now with Insight Timer, but wasn’t really meditating to become psychic – until these last few months when all of a sudden it became a desire, an actual goal. The idea stayed with me and hasn’t left so that means it must be something that I’m supposed to be doing.

I meditated for 6 minutes yesterday with music. In the book Psychic Pathway, Sonia Choquette suggests classical so I put on something that my mom used to play on the piano that I loved listening to: Moonlight Sonata by Beethoven, but only the first movement (the first 6 something minutes of it). It’s moody, dark and beautiful. The rest of it is way too upbeat in my opinion.

Anyways as soon as I played it and closed my eyes, I was back in my mom’s old house across the street from where I live now. The house was painted the way it was before: white with a slightly darker red trim. My mom was playing Moonlight Sonata in the living room but it was dark, with only a dimly lit lamp. It was eerie but calming at the same time to see my mom playing on her favorite grand piano. I was in the hallway watching her play with her back toward me. Then I ended up on the couch next to the grand piano somehow.

While she was playing though, I looked up and saw different MEI pictures (mental emotional images) of my mom flash before my eyes – at first she was normal. But then I saw her flash to when she was sick and near death, so thin and emaciated. Basically how she looked when she left her body. It was my least favorite memory of her. Then I became frightened because her image flashed like an old TV switching channels and she became half a corpse. She was looking at me and still playing the piano, I wanted to turn away. But I looked at her, got up and sat next to her while she continued to play the piano. I wasn’t going to be afraid, I have to appreciate my mom’s soul in all forms, even in death.

I sat next to her slightly afraid, so I closed my eyes and imagined that she was bathed in light. And so she became a luminous bright, yellow golden white light. Yellow was one of her favorite colors. I turned to face her and I saw my mom again, in the flesh before she was sick. And she smiled at me.

Here is a quick sketch, and here’s a photo of my mom, who passed away after having chemo treatment for ovarian cancer on December 20, 2006. My mom was also a piano teacher while working fulltime at the bank. Her true passion was music and playing the piano.

Random but now that I think about it – there was a scene from Interview with a Vampire where a half dead Lestat was playing the piano after Claudia and Louis tried to kill him.

Edit: I shared this experience with my witchy friend, she says this is mediumship. According to Sharon Farber: Mediumship is when an embodied person communicates with recognizable spirits of those who are considered dead.

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I keep this blog, this website, this identity because I feel safe here. I feel less restricted in being able to say what I want to say and not have to dumb it down or make it less weird for everyone else. This is me talking to me.

I have separate accounts and separate aliases because you can’t lump yourself into one thing, at least in my opinion. You have to put yourself into categories that are digestible for people. From a metaphysical perspective, this is how Consciousness manifests itself – it is One thing broken up into a billion pieces, experiencing itself. That is us, that is what we do.

Anyway, here is my latest drawing for Inktober 2019. The prompt is: ring. I really like how it turned out. Instead of being hard on myself for not drawing on a regular basis, I am learning to appreciate my sporadic moments where I am motivated and can create something that I like.

At this point, I don’t care if other people like it anymore.

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Something I drew the other day in one shot, no pencil sketch. When I came home from work I didn’t want to get on the computer again so I drew. But that’s a lie because I DID get on the computer for a bit but my eyes were so over it. I got off and drew this.

Fact: it seems that I can no longer draw people. I just want to draw lines, shapes & symbols.

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So as promised from my tweet on Twitter last week:

In other news, I’ve become an expert at making DAT ASS shake. I think this will be my next Photoshop tutorial. The output will be a small file size animated gif with only 3 frames.

You’re welcome.— Miss Nobody (@savethesavages) April 4, 2019

I’m writing this fun Photoshop tutorial on How to Make DAT ASS Shake!

Your output will be an animated gif of a booty shaking ass similar to this one, created entirely by YOU:

First of all, what’s the freakin purpose of this?

1. Just for fun, just to get those creative juices flowing. Does everything have to have a purpose & meaning?

2. Maybe you work in the art & marketing department and for whatever reason, your idea calls for some booty shaking or some kind of animation that jiggles.

3. I just felt like writing a fun tutorial since it’s been a while. If you read this blog, then you know I enjoy writing.

4. If you draw AND use Photoshop a lot, this will be good practice.

Who should do this?

Anyone who uses Photoshop a lot. I would say beginners can probably do this, if you’re intermediate to advanced then you can definitely do this.

I am using Adobe Photoshop CC 2019

The first part of this tutorial is drawing a butt. The second part will be to animate it.

STEP 1:
Create a new file in Photoshop. Mine is 450 x 600 pixels.

STEP 2:
Make sure you save your file first. You don’t want to start creating & not save your awesome work if your Photoshop tends to crash.

STEP 3:
In your layers panel, create a new layer and name it ‘outline’ (it’s the icon to the left of the trashcan). Also create a new folder called ’01’ and put this outline layer inside. This is your first frame of animation.

STEP 4:
Go ahead and draw a butt with the brush tool. 

STEP 5:
Create a new folder in your layers panel and call it ’02’. Also create a new layer for your 2nd outline.

STEP 6:
Click either on the 01 folder or 01 outline and change the opacity of it to 20%. Opacity option is located on the upper right hand corner of the layers panel.

STEP 7:
Click back to your 02 outline layer. You will be drawing another butt, with 01 layer as your guide or onion skin. Don’t exactly trace over the 01 outline, but rather make the butt sway to the right side.

STEP 8:
You are going to repeat steps 5 through 7 to create a 3rd folder and your third outline layer. You can also bring the opacity of your first outline layer back to 100% or you can leave it as is for now. Up to you.

You can also click the eyeball icon to the left of your layer to hide the 01 folder so you can concentrate on the the 3rd.

So at this point, you should have 3 folders – each with an outline layer of a butt. You’ve drawn each layer slightly different to simulate a woman’s butt ‘shaking’.

BONUS STEP 01:
You can take it further by coloring each butt. For the sake of keeping it simple for this tutorial, I’m going to skip it.

STEP 9:
GIF animation time. If you don’t have it open yet, make sure your timeline is out. If not, go to Window menu > Timeline. Your timeline should show up at the bottom.

STEP 10:
Go back to your layer 01 outline, make sure it’s selected.

Then go back to your timeline and click the button ‘Create Frame Animation’

You should now have a frame appearing in your timeline are with 0 sec. Click and hold the little arrow to change it to 0.2 seconds.

STEP 11:
In your time area, there’s an icon to the left of the trashcan icon. Click that to copy your frame.

STEP 12:
While you have that 2nd frame selected, go back to your Layers panel and turn OFF the eyeball for folder 01, turn ON the eyeball for folder 02.

At this point, with your timeline panel selected you can hit the spacebar on your keyboard and watch your booty shaking! Hit the spacebar again to stop the animation.

STEP 13:
You can repeat steps 10 through 12 to make your 3rd animation frame.

If any of this is confusing, remember that you have to ‘match’ your timeline frames to your layers through selecting:

selecting timeline frame 01 selects folder & layer outline 01
selecting timeline frame 02 selects folder & layer outline 02
selecting timeline frame 03 selects folder & layer outline 03

HERE’S A TIP:
Photoshop will trip you up and turn folders on for you when you don’t want them on. So make sure other folders aren’t turned on in your animation frame!

BONUS STEP 02:
If you don’t like the speed of your animation, maybe it’s too slow for your taste; you can hit the Shift key while selecting all 3 frames in your timeline, click the little arrow and change it to 0.1 seconds or something else.

BONUS STEP 03:
Now you can add details to each frame if you want, like flesh tones. Remember to create new layers for each added detail within that layer folder.

So for example, I want to add shines to the butt.

Let’s go to 01 folder, click on your outline and create a new layer. Let’s call it ‘shines’

With your brush set to white or something, draw a shine to accentuate her butt.

BONUS STEPS 04:
I’m going to add a panty line. You can repeat BONUS STEP 03

TO SAVE THIS AS AN ANIMATED GIF:
Go to File menu > Export > Save for Web

Make sure you have GIF selected on the upper right panel, then hit ‘Save…’

Name it however you want, just make sure your file has the .gif extension

You can download the PSD and the animated gif that I created above here.

Have fun! I hope this was fun for you as it was for me!

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I realize that this blog of mine is sloppy as fuck. It’s a mess for sure but at the same time, I really don’t care. This is my personal art blog, this is where I get to truly express myself and say all that I want to say. I don’t get to do that on my other sites. Though I’ve put up artwork for sale on here, I’ve really not tried to monetize this.

Actually, I did try to use AdSense once but my site wasn’t good enough for Google. Oh well.

So if you’re visiting this site – yes, I’ve redirected SHERMGRAFIK.com to here. Sherm is long gone, it was an old graffiti identity.

What’s going on with me these days? I honestly don’t know. I’ve been in this neutral zone. I want to learn and do so many things that I tend to get pulled into different directions, thinking that I can do it all. Part of me wishes to know what my purpose is but I think I’m going to drive myself insane if I keep asking. It’s almost as if I’m not satisfied with the answers, as if my life purpose is supposed to be profound and exotic.

I think in some ways, I’m just supposed to be me.

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I drew this today (Monday, November 5 2018).

I’m here, trying to just be and go with the flow. I once saw someone on Twitter tweet this out: “only dead fish go with the flow”.

So as usual, I’m conflicted.

Like, how do we just go with the flow if we are conscious beings, when we’re wired a certain way. It really takes effort to reprogram our minds and to find balance between wanting stuff to happen already versus allowing it to come to you.

I want so many things, but mostly I want to learn everything that fascinates me.

Right now I have a list of things I want to learn or make my way towards:

Light Language
Medical Intuitive
Holistic Life Coach
Quantum Healing Hypnosis
Transpersonal Psychology

I’ve also been considering going into Massage Therapy but then again I’m not sure whether I’m ready to touch people…I’m still thinking about it though.

I don’t know. I want to focus on one thing and get really good at it. But it also feels like I need to do other things too. Why? Selling minerals is cool but tbh, I’m already losing interest in it. Perhaps I was a bit naive in thinking that I was always going to make consistent sales, but not only that – selling gets boring after a while. I feel that I also made some poor decisions and spent more than I made. Lesson learned, I guess.

My intuition is leading me to a consciousness upgrade, it seems. It wants me to learn all this stuff that I’ve never even considered wanting to get into.

So here I am again, wondering where my life is going next. I honestly don’t know anymore. This is what wanted to come out today while drawing.

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Today is Friday 9/14/18 and I’m on fire right now, or as the kids would say: I’m LIT as fuck.? HA.

Putting things into place now that can only grow and get bigger in the future.

Yesterday in the morning, I did a crystal healing on myself again. This time, along with the other stones – I put my Pyrite with Quartz right on my solar plexus, the third chakra. Pyrite is masculine energy, manifestation, action, vitality, willpower, creativity, confidence; so I wonder if there is a direct correlation with this newfound drive and motivation I’m experiencing right now? I think so.

I’ve been working with that Pyrite with Quartz since the beginning of my business in 2017, it’s definitely doing its work. I actually did a lot of the things that I only talked or dreamed about, I even surprised myself. It’s a trip to watch yourself evolve.

Now I’m working on building my crystal healing practice, so I put up another website: crystalhealerLA.com – putting my digital marketing skills to use to build it up. I’m excited to create original content for it.

I don’t have a whole lot of clients yet, so I’ve been doing these crystal healings on myself – in order to understand what’s really happening when crystal energy is interacting with the human energy field. I want to be able to test and prove that something IS happening, even when we can’t see it. Not for the non-believers but really for myself and my future clients.

It’s all an experiment really, but I really like where I’m going with all of this right now. I plan to stay creatively focused.

The biggest takeaway for wanting to do something, is to just do it. Don’t expect perfection, just dive right in; you’ll learn as you go and you’ll perfect things as you do them.

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I was digging through old files when I stumbled upon this old drawing. My mom was Christian so after she passed away in 2006, my soul wanted to draw, paint and explore the dark stuff. I was fascinated by the occult, Satanism, Anton LaVey and the image of the devil.

I was also heavily influenced by tattoo imagery, so I borrowed the devil image from Sailor Jerry’s flash. I wanted to be a tattoo artist at some point, so I bought a tattoo machine – tattooed myself and a couple of people out of my home. I was a scratcher, I didn’t get very far :/

Anyways, I guess I’m just reminiscing.

The Devil (15) is still my friend. I look forward to seeing him and I actually laugh, wondering what kind of temptation will he present to me whenever he shows up via tarot, or will he play the devil’s advocate through a person I encounter that day? You never know and that’s why I like him. He breaks up the seriousness of the tarot with his presence.

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Something about being in Leo season that’s making me determined as fuck.

I’m feeling a surge of energy from the sun.

In comparison to Cancer season, I feel a lot more stable and have clarity on what I need to do next…sort of.

Cancer season was turning me into a emotional wreck for no reason. I almost felt like a victim? A victim of my own fucking mind when it turns on me and starts to get me to think in limited ways.

I drive myself crazy sometimes. I feel alone on this because I feel like it’s up to me to keep up with finances, to figure out how to bring in more money. I feel like I’m the only one who invests in myself.

Anyways…

Right now I have investments and entrepreneurship on my mind. I think at this point I will have to create my own damn job; I keep looking on CL for something else but none of them appeal to me at all. The stuff that used to interest me no longer does.

Not only that but the deeper I go into metaphysical stuff, the less I can relate to the three-dimensional world.

At this point I really don’t want to work for anyone else but myself. How do I parlay this?

And is this a sign? It must be because it’s all I’ve been thinking about.

The Fool (0) has been showing up a few times now. This card usually never shows up, unless it’s time for me to dive into the unknown again.

And 8 of Swords is the card that tends to remind me of the so called “prison” that I created.

I have a few ideas (some are risky while most are just past my comfort zone) but at the moment I can’t think of anything else:

+ Pull out money from my 401k account, quit my job and live off of that while I bring up my small business.

+ Live a lean & frugal lifestyle. Downgrade to a smaller place (might have to be an apartment, meh) and cut out the cable and other stuff so I can have less expenses.

+ Move closer to my work so I don’t have to drive my car & spend so much money on gas and car repairs; I can just walk.

These are just ideas that have been running through my head these last couple of months. All I know is, something has to change. If this is my dream, then surely I can change it right?

Here’s my latest drawing: Soul Star and the Stellar Gateway. These are based off the 12 chakra system according to Katrina Raphaell in her book The Crystal Transmission.

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Never have I minded my business so hard than after Reiki II attunement. Other than learning to use two more symbols for channeling life force energy and healing, I didn’t think anything would really happen afterwards…

Let’s just say anything tied to my emotional attachments have completely dropped off. I haven’t had any desire to post on Twitter or lurk on anyone’s Instagram, I feel as if I have nothing to say. I am in my own world right now.

I literally feel like a bodhisattva, surrounded by lotus flowers and floating on a cloud. Seeing everything from a higher perspective, wanting to help people end their suffering. I’m physically here and simultaneously on another plane of existence…

except I’m not a bodhisattva. I still have to go to work and look at nudes. 8 years of working in the adult entertainment industry, let’s just say I’m ready for something else…but what that something else is, I don’t even know.

I was going to post a pic of a Green Tara but chose to do this rough sketch instead and started playing with it more. Her skin is green so I made this girl green.

Everything’s the same and yet everything’s different.

My TCT final is this weekend, June 9th. I’ve been practicing doing crystal therapy on people at least once a week. So thankful that my friends & co-workers are open minded enough to try it. During my final, I’ll be doing a crystal therapy on someone I don’t know…

wish me luck.

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