Fear is a strong word and not the word I prefer to use, but merely wanted the title of this post to jump out at you.

I’m sure you are aware of this already – people are posting more videos these days, whether it’s on Snapchat, Periscope, Vine, or YouTube. Do a Google search and you’ll see that YouTube is in the top 5 of the world’s most visited websites.

I feel like I’m one of the very last people on planet Earth to get on board. Why?

I’m not exactly new to video marketing; I’ve posted some videos on behalf of the company I work for. But no real, live people were involved; and I only used my voice, once. It was awkward, at least for me. The videos were mostly made in After Effects with existing photos and audio. I’m still learning how to edit in Premiere.

I’m terrified of the thought of people looking at my face, let alone watching me talk. I know I’m not the only one, right? Plus when you come from a graffiti subculture where your painting skills were more important than your face (NOBODY ever showed their face)…you kinda see why this is a challenge for me, right?

It’s not like I’m hiding or am deliberately antisocial in everyday life…video is just very new territory for me when it comes to myself.

Although for me personally, I’d rather go with the artsy type of video like this one. It just seems like people are starving for content though – like how to videos, tutorials, life hacks, etc. If you are a business owner or just promoting yourself it’s just not enough anymore to have a website or blog, or to just post on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. Video is pretty much already part of the internet landscape. A lot of people don’t even want to read anymore, for fuck’s sake; they’d rather watch a video. I like to do both.

Anyway, so I’m trying to figure out how to leverage using video for my stuff. I guess the main obstacles are:

1) come up with a video that will be of use to others and
2) get over myself and the fear of my face being shown in video :/

The video above was made in After Effects – just playing around with the CC Mercury and Particles plugin. Then I made the movie into a GIF in Photoshop. If you pull the file down, you’ll see that it’s a 10.7 MB file with 353 frames, lol. Your GIFs shouldn’t be that big but I did it anyway. Maybe I’ll make a tutorial soon once I have the steps down…

If you happen to be reading this and have posted videos on YouTube, how do you get over being nervous when it comes to creating videos that feature yourself?

Not sure what to post or vlog about? I searched for 10 Simple Vlog Ideas for You to Try Out

At some point in life, one has to rebuild or reinvent themselves. Maybe even more than once, but a few times in a span of a lifetime.

Your past no longer defines who you are now at this present moment.

I imagine this is how musicians must feel when fans are attached to their more popular songs; people keep wanting to hear you play those same songs over and over but you (the artist) have been ready to move on for sometime now.

But I have to admit, Purple Rain is Prince’s best album. EVER. RIP

I understand this because I have been in the process of doing just that, making others aware of me but from a different view.

It’s not easy, but it can be done. Your past friends might not ‘get’ you anymore, or you might have just drifted apart with those you used to be tight with. It happens.

And yes, there are a ton of artists, writers, makers, creators out there who want to be noticed for their work too but don’t be discouraged if you feel as if no one is paying attention to you and what you have to offer.

You must keep trying, but not in a way that makes you look thirsty (that’s a whole another topic in itself). It is better to make an effort than to be in a defeated mindset and say outloud “no one’s gonna buy my stuff” or “no one’s gonna give me the time of day”.

“No one likes my art.”
“No one likes my music.”
“No one reads my blog.”
“I’m not good at this.”

How do you know that? How do you know what people like or don’t like? You DON’T know.

As far as not being good at it, then you must practice. It’s the only way to get good at something. Even those who are naturally gifted have to practice their craft; it may come easier for them because of their talent – but practice and consistency is involved in any endeavor.

Here’s a personal example: I don’t think I am very good at writing. I am good at blogging about personal shit…as a matter of fact I am an EXPERT at it (haha); but writing for an actual audience – being helpful, making it interesting and to the point? That’s definitely a challenge for me. But I am making the effort with this blog post, I am practicing more and more.

The one thing you don’t want to do is put yourself down. Try not to say anything negative about yourself, try not to say anything negative about others.

Continue to create for yourself. Act like nobody’s watching.

So I hope this blog post motivates you a little. I know, I know…there’s already a FUCK TON of motivational quotes, words from ‘influencers’, experts, gurus, etcetera out there.

But I am just like you, I am trying too. I want to put more effort into this blog, I want to get better at writing quality blog posts on topics that I can discuss. I want to keep pumping out new drawings to go along with these blog posts.

Here are some new rough drawings from my sketchbook. I kinda like coloring with office supplies, hi-liters in particular :]

Flexing my creative writing muscles. I felt compelled to write this piece / commentary / poem / whatever you want to call it – but I also wanted a drawing to go along with it.


The Internet Goddess walks among you. She remains anonymous but watches, observes all human computer interaction. She absorbs it all and uses it…

for marketing & advertising purposes.

WTF?

Yup, she is a mirror of you. She is you and you are her. The way you talk, what kind of slang you use, your pains, your gains.

She, we, her, I…

throw it all back at you.

So buy something already. She needs to see some kind of ROI.

I am the occult Internet Goddess. Worship my coding, copywriting, blogging, video editing, web design, graphic design, SEO, marketing skillz…

I am everything. I am nothing. I move freely from desktop computer, to laptop, to tablet, to mobile phone.

I am everywhere and nowhere.

People underestimate the Internet Goddess. She’s not popular, she doesn’t have followers, WTF does she do??

The Internet Goddess puts herself in service to others. In doing that, she thrives.

Egoless, heart centered, she will work hard for you. Sounds like a gimmick, but it’s not.

The Internet Goddess can lure you in with her mind (posts), body (pictures) and soul (likes) if she really wanted to…

but she’s busy, just like you.

You will probably not meet her IRL, but you will know her work online. You will start to recognize that she can assimilate other people’s thoughts, yet retain her own identity…

the identity of nothing.

In being nothing, she can contain everything.

Just like The One Reality.

She’s out there, surfing the internet. Thinking, feeling, posting, typing…

Maybe she’ll text you occasionally, maybe she won’t.

Only a handful know her IRL.

She prefers not to be known.

I am the occult Internet Goddess, and I will live forever…

on your screen.

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My cat Tabby started vomiting recently, even though we feed her the same kind of food – a can of wet food (Purina Pro Plan) and some kibble (Nutro). There are a number of reasons why a cat would vomit, but the main reason usually has to do with their diet. Apparently a cat can develop allergic reactions to food as well. We had to figure out which one is the culprit and we think it’s the kibble. I am just posting this link as a reminder.

Learn the Reasons Cats Vomit

So I decided over the weekend to put up my old website and it’s domain, shermgrafik.com back online.

It will serve as an archive of my old work. And if I am attempting to do the art thing yet again, then it’s important for people to understand my background.

The site was redirecting to Save the Savages, but decided to make them separate.

What is the reason for this? I believe that if I did have an audience, they wouldn’t like every part of me jumbled together into one, confusing mass…

so even though we are one and the same individual – I am creating the illusion of separateness.

Our human brains like to categorize things, and so does the internet.

So those who like my old graffiti & art stuff can go over there. Those who like the stuff I do now can stay here.

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I’ve been wanting to talk crystals on here, but I didn’t know how to go about it. I didn’t have the perfect photo to capture the perfect angle of any of my stones, but today I felt compelled to write something.

I’ve only been collecting crystals and gemstones for a few years, and it feels like I’m barely at the tip of the iceberg of really learning from them.

But I’m also excited that more and more people are using them to expand consciousness and to assist with spiritual growth – I never thought I’d be one of those people but life is weird, awesome and mysterious in that in unfolds in unexpected ways if you let it.

All I know is, I was searching for some kind of healing. I was full of hate, jealousy, anger, resentment. I also allowed stress to get the best of me, I cared too much about what people thought and I still couldn’t get over the death of my mom from December 2006. I was always aware of these negative feelings, but no matter how hard I tried to not feel them – I couldn’t escape them. My mind and my ego ruled more than my heart.

I truly believe that having crystals near you can change your vibration and expand your consciousness. They are able to assist us with so many things. Here’s a personal example:

I had to move to a new place recently and I was concerned about the people who lived there previously – I was wondering if they had bad or negative vibes.

So before we moved in completely, I wanted to grid the house with crystals, by making a crystal grid. I found this helpful page on crystals to use for home protection. I had searched for a few ways, but this one was the easiest to do. We also used palo santo.

That was 6 months ago, and I can safely say that I feel protected and safe in the house I’m living in.

I have more examples of crystal assistance, but for another time.

This is a picture of my first set of crystals. I love them all but I tend to gravitate to Tiger Eye, Labradorite, Fluorite and Amethyst.

And for those who are reading this and asking why, you can search online and read a few articles, including this. And trust me when I say that I’ve asked the same questions. Everyone has to experience crystal energy for themselves.